times like these you REALLY NEED A MAN IN YOUR LIFE!

This is one of those stupid things that really happened. It happened a long time ago but my memory of it is really vivid!
Usually when I come home each day my two cats are right at the door anxiously awaiting my arrival. However, this one day I walked in and no greeting?! I said "hello?!"... and waited... I heard this really weird cat voice in response. I'm thinking... WTF?!!! so, I go upstairs. For those of you who don't know, I live in a 800 sq. foot loft-style townhouse in Santa Monica, 5 blocks from the beach. Its nice for one person and two cats.
So, back to the story, I walk up the stairs and I see both of the cats sitting on the bed looking up very intently. As I look up something bigger than any bug I have ever seen flies around the room! I screamed and the cats jumped and followed it!
It was a bird!... a freaking bird had flown into my house! Yikes! We don't have bug problems at the beach and my place is 3 stories high. You cannot get in from the outside without a ladder so I USE TO leave my screen door on my balcony open all the time... that's how the bird got in.
Anyway, somehow it made it into the bathroom. Now this poor bird is flying around panicking... it can't find its way out. He smashed into the wall a few times and the windows too. The cats are freaking out! Dinner! and, I'm freaking out too!
OMG!!! What in the world do I do here?! I can hear myself complaining "this is exactly why a girl needs a man in her life! ugh!"
So, I went to my kitchen and got the biggest pot and lid I could find. Somehow I managed to corner that bird an capture it in the pan. Picture me tripping over the cats continuously under my feet making that weird desperate cat cry cats make... It seemed like it took forever. The time frame here is blurry!
Once I caught the bird I went out to the balcony and removed the lid of the pot I had caught it in. The bird flew away off into the distance.
The cats were clearly disappointed. I was relieved!... From then on I always close the screen door. Still, it would be nice to have a guy around... for a lot of other personal reasons... plus stuff like that!